you might be a hunter if..........

B

bigbullhunter

Guest
1. You have more parts than bows laying around the workshop;

2. You have 47 dozen aluminum arrows in various sizes ... none of which are straight;

3. Your archery tacklebox is bigger than your car trunk;

4. Your family is used to the smell of doe pee and cow in heat lure;

5. You have more sets of camo than you do business suits;

6. You bathe more in hunting camp than you do at home;

7. The neighbors no longer call the cops to report a scream when you're practicing with your bugle before elk season;

8. You've got more McKenzie body parts laying around your yard than most pro shops have in stock;

9. Your bowhunting setup cost more than your first honeymoon;

10. Your kids and dog forget who you are during the hunting seasons;

11. You only spend 8 hours a day at work so you can spend 16 hours a day sitting in a stand on the weekend;

12. Your grandmother/grandfather/uncle/aunt/cousin/etc have each been buried more than once and you attended each funeral ... or at least the boss thinks so;

13. You've ever mixed up your pee bottle and your thermos in the dark (My Joe this coffee sure has a whang to it!);

14.You're license plate is "BUKFVR", or "BUGLER".
15: If your neighbor's wife asks you to move your Mckenzies because her kids think they are real deer and they want you to stop killin em.

16: You go thru the drive-thru at a fast food joint and you're 3 year old child yells out at the intercom that he wants a super-sized order of backstraps

17. You can field dress a deer faster than you can change a baby

18. You have your kids put a 3-d target in the back of your 78 ford, and drive really slow. This allows you to practice on moving shots

19. You've ever left more than $30.00 worth of arrows stuck in the top of a tree because you missed that stupid squirrel more than once.

20. You have a ballpoint pen with fletches on it;

Your wife notices your eyes glaze over when you see deer in the middle of summer.

If you have ever wandered if your mother-in-law will respond to a grunt call.

your 6 year old can score bucks to within a inch but can't do multiplication

You're scared sh**less of heights, yet you eagerly entertain the thought of sitting way up in some tree on the off-chance of an "off-chance" shot;

Keep them coming guys
BBH
 
if you use an arrow as a truck antenna....

if buying your out-of-state hunting license is a higher priority than paying the mortgage....

if for your 10th wedding anniversary, you suggest a high dollar hunting trip....

if when your kids are asked what you do for work, they tell people your a big buck hunter....

if you spend more on taxidermy each year than you do groceries....

if the neighbor kids are affraid to enter your basement, for fear of all the animals on the walls....

if while at a romantic dinner with your wife, you ask her, "what unit do you think I should apply for?"

if your idea of a special date with your wife is to take her to a wildlife fundraiser banquet dinner....

Brian Latturner
MonsterMuleys.com
 
family vacations revolve around hunting season.
someone asks where you live you have to reply with, "depends on what season is open"

You spend more money on gas during hunting season than your truck is actually worth.

Your favorite color is Camouflage

someone says a girl has a huge rack you wonder how wide it is and what it will score

you have a hard time with simple mathematics but can field judge a mule deer to within 2 inches in less than a second.

Drummond
 
If youve ever had the cops called on you for shooting cats with your bow for practice.

If youve ever been caught cutting holes out of the screne in your window to practice those long shots with your bow at robbins on your neighbors lawn.

If youve ever spent financial aid money that was supposed to be used for college on hunting gear.

(all of which i have done)
 
You plan your wedding and your children around next years hunts. Anyone that's not smart enough to do the same shouldn't be suprised when you don't show up for their weddings and birthdays.

NvrEnuf
 
You attend a friends funeral....hummm... wonder if the wife is going to keep that T/C muzzle he just brought.. I be glad to give her a couple of $$$ of it !!!
 
You name your dog buck & duct tape deer sheds on during Halloween w/ buck lure .....that'll teach them....( you hear the word deer & and say "yea lets get some more beer".( A police man pulls you over @ 4:00 in the morning...where are you going this early ...Going elk hunting ! lets see your licence...hehe you show him the ELK licence...ouch !!!
 
While driving through the city you get pulled over because the cop thought you were taking a bong hit, when you were simply practicing your buggles............................rf
 
You know that the cop is a hunter when:

He pulls you over for speeding (which you were doing) and talks more about your elk antlers and where you got the elk than the speeding, then just gives you a warning.

Actually happened to me!

txhunter58

venor, ergo sum (I hunt, therefore I am)
 

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