Lay Offs

Business was terrible and not picking up. I had to fire somebody, and I narrowed it down to one of two people, Debra or Jack.
It was an impossible decision because they were both super workers.
Rather than flip a coin, I decided I would fire the first one who used the water-cooler the next morning.
When Debra came in with a horrible hangover after partying all night, she went directly to the cooler to take an aspirin.
I approached her and said, "Debra, I've never done this before, but I have to either lay you or Jack off.?
"Could you jack-off for now?" she replied. "I feel like #####. If you can wait, I'll do you at lunchtime.?
I had to let Jack go.

Good one....

Cancer doesn't discriminate...don't take your good health for granted because it can be gone in a heartbeat. Please go back and read the last line. This time really understand what it says.

lmao