THE BEST AND WORST WEEK OF MY LIFE

T

Tuffbucker

Very Active Member
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On December 22, 2004, my wife gave birth to our first child, a little girl. We named her Maddisyn. Maddisyn was born 7 weeks early, and with her fair share of compications. We nearly lost her just hours after she was born. She had to be taken to Primary CHildren's Hospital, where she was placed on a heart/lung bypass machine, to give her little lungs a chance to heal and get strong. After 6 days on the machine, it was decided that she was doing okay to be taken off of the machine, but still had much of her breathing done by a respirator.

She did wonderfully her first night off of the machine. I spent the next day at her bedside, feeling that things were looking up, even though the doctors said she wasn't out of the woods yet. The day after she came off of the ECMO(bypass) machine was exactly 1 week after she was born. At approx. 5:30 pm, she took a drastic turn for the worst, the reason why is still unknown. Maddisyn passed away just prior to 7:00 that night. I literally feel like my world has just ended. Tommorrow I have to bury my little girl. It is the hardest thing I have faced in my entire life.

I truly hope that no one here will have to go through this kind of pain. Many of you on here have been like a second family of sorts, so I wanted to share with you all the story of my blessed daughter, Maddisyn Maree Arnold.

God Bless,

Scott
Here is a link to her obituary:
http://www.legacy.com/DeseretNews/LegacySubPage2.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonId=2986997
 
Tuff,
My heartbroke when I read your post. Don't know really what to say but you and your family are in my prayers.
069729.gif
 
Scott,
I can't begin to know how you must be feeling, but you are are in my prayers. I hope you find comfort and joy in the memories of the time you spent with your daughter.
Scott/couesbitten
 
Tuff, So sorry to hear about your loss, my wife and i lost our first pregnency to a miscarrage....never waited so long for something we wanted so badly, only to have it taken away in a moments notice, so i kindof know how you feel..kind of. It's extremely hard and it never seems like it will get better, but god does work in mysterious ways. Keep your chin up! You will never forget her. Good luck!!!!
 
Tuff, my heart goes out to you and your family. I can't imagine the pain and grief that you are going through, but know that you and your wife will be in our prayers tonight.
 
May God be with you, yor wife, and family. I am so sorry for you. I to cannot imagine your pain.
 
I see from the obituary that you share my belief that your lovely little daughter has returned to her Heavenly Father and is waiting to be joyfully reunited with you some day. Rest assured that she was a special spirit that didn't need to be tested in mortality like the rest of us.

Keeping an eternal perspective is the only way to make it through difficult times like this. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
 
Tuff
Man, thats a tough one and puts all other thing in place. Truely something I wish you didn't have to go through. I wish you and your wife the best through this tough time. Know that she is truely in the arms of her Heavenly Father and feeling his love. Good luck.
Yelum
 
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I lost my father this past December but it isn't the same as losing a child. God does things that we don't always understand. Be strong and reach out to God for comfort.

One night a man had a dream.

He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand; one belonged to him, and the other to the Lord.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. he noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it. "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that at the worst times in my life, there is only one set of footprints. How could you leave me when I needed you the most?"

The Lord replied " My precious, precious child, I love you and would never leave you. During your times of suffering and when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried
you."

Sincerly, Keith Fish.
 
Tuff:
I wish there was some thing that I could do or say that would take the pain away but I know that I can't. But rest assured the pain will fade with time. My prayers go out to you and your family during this time of sorrow.
 
I'm so very sorry for your loss. My wife and I lost a child too and I know somewhat the pain you're going through. It seems like nothing will make it better, even time, but somehow eventually it does in a way. Be strong for your wife - that is a pain I cannot imagine (a mother losing a child)
 
Scott,
My deepest condolences to you and your family at this difficult time. You'll be in our thoughts and prayers.

God Bless,
Oakbuck
 
Tuff,

My heart and prayers go out to you. Nobody should ever have to bury a child. I won't try to say something consuling. It sucks. Stand with God, he will guide you. He will embrace your daughter for a child is the purest form of innocence.

Blair
 
Scott, I am very sorry for your loss. One brother to another, If there is anything you need I will be there in a second. You and your wife are in our prayers.
Later, Brandon
 
So sorry to hear that Tuff, hang in there, Time Heals, Always! She is in a better place, the best place.
 
>On December 22, 2004, my wife
>gave birth to our first
>child, a little girl. We
>named her Maddisyn. Maddisyn was
>born 7 weeks early, and
>with her fair share of
>compications. We nearly lost her
>just hours after she was
>born. She had to be
>taken to Primary CHildren's Hospital,
>where she was placed on
>a heart/lung bypass machine, to
>give her little lungs a
>chance to heal and get
>strong. After 6 days on
>the machine, it was decided
>that she was doing okay
>to be taken off of
>the machine, but still had
>much of her breathing done
>by a respirator.
>
>She did wonderfully her first night
>off of the machine. I
>spent the next day at
>her bedside, feeling that things
>were looking up, even though
>the doctors said she wasn't
>out of the woods yet.
>The day after she came
>off of the ECMO(bypass) machine
>was exactly 1 week after
>she was born. At approx.
>5:30 pm, she took a
>drastic turn for the worst,
>the reason why is still
>unknown. Maddisyn passed away just
>prior to 7:00 that night.
>I literally feel like my
>world has just ended. Tommorrow
>I have to bury my
>little girl. It is the
>hardest thing I have faced
>in my entire life.
>
>I truly hope that no one
>here will have to go
>through this kind of pain.
>Many of you on here
>have been like a second
>family of sorts, so I
>wanted to share with you
>all the story of my
>blessed daughter, Maddisyn Maree Arnold.
>
>
>God Bless,
>
>Scott
>Here is a link to her
>obituary:
>http://www.legacy.com/DeseretNews/LegacySubPage2.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonId=2986997

My wife and I give you our deepest condolences.
 
This also happened to one of my sisters. It was very devistating to everyone in my family. Doctors told her she got off easy, there's much worse case scenario's.
 
So sorry man....the fact that you can come on here an express a few emotions with us all, I hope helps. You and your wife will be in my thoughts.
 
Scott,
My heart and soul goes out to your wife and you along with your family on this sudden lost. It is such a sad time for all having been there many years ago when my wife had two different miscarrages and told she could never have children.
I wish all of you the best.

Brian
 
Man I feel your pain, my wife and I lost our first child a girl also, it was the most gut wrenching thing I can remember...keep trying don't give up!...God will give you more children...she's sitting now besides him.....blessings to you and your wife...it'll get better with time....Peace....
 
>I am so sorry to hear
>of your loss. I lost
>my father this past December
>but it isn't the same
>as losing a child. God
>does things that we don't
>always understand. Be strong and
>reach out to God for
>comfort.
>
>One night a man had a
>dream.
>
>He dreamed he was walking along
>the beach with the Lord.
>Across the sky flashed scenes
>from his life. For each
>scene he noticed two sets
>of footprints in the sand;
>one belonged to him, and
>the other to the Lord.
>
>
>When the last scene of his
>life flashed before him, he
>looked back at the footprints
>in the sand. he noticed
>that many times along the
>path of his life there
>was only one set of
>footprints. He also noticed that
>it happened at the very
>lowest and saddest times in
>his life.
>
>This really bothered him and he
>questioned the Lord about it.
>"Lord, you said that once
>I decided to follow you,
>you'd walk with me all
>the way. But I have
>noticed that at the worst
>times in my life, there
>is only one set of
>footprints. How could you leave
>me when I needed you
>the most?"
>
>The Lord replied " My precious,
>precious child, I love you
>and would never leave you.
>During your times of suffering
>and when you see only
>one set of footprints, it
>was then that I carried
>
>you."
>
> Sincerly, Keith Fish.


AMEN FISH!!!!!!!
 
Words cannot express my sympathy to you and your family, especially your wife. We lost a child to a miscarriage this fall, its not the same but I can understand the depth of your sadness.

God has a plan. Your beautiful daughter is safe, happy and free from pain and sickness. And you will see her again.

I have copied the obituary here:

"Maddisyn Maree Arnold "Our Little Angel" On December 29, 2004, after having completed her earthly mission, our little angel was called back home to her Heavenly Father's care. Although she was only with us for a short time, she impacted the lives of all who knew her. Maddisyn was born on December 22, 2004 in Salt Lake City to Mindy and Scott Arnold. She is survived by her grandparents, Tom and Lollie Arnold and Ken and Karen Harrington, as well as many aunts, uncles and cousins who loved her very much. She was preceded in death by her great grandmas, her great grandpa, and other loved ones who we know will care for her until that glorious day that she is reunited with her parents. A special thank you to all the staff at LDS Hospital's MFM and NICU as well as Primary Children's Medical Center NICU, for all the wonderful love and care they provided to her during her earthly journey. A special thanks to Dr. M. Sean Esplin and Maddisyn's favorite nurse, Natalie. Thank you, Natalie, for taking the time to make sure Maddisyn had pretty bows in her hair every day. A gathering for family and friends will take place on Monday, January 3, 2005, from 11:00 a.m.-12:00 p.m. at the McDougal Funeral Home at 4330 South Redwood Road, followed by a graveside service 12:30 p.m. at West Jordan City Cemetery, 7800 South 1300 West. "Maddisyn, we love you and will miss you everyday that you are gone from us, but we look forward to the day that we will be reunited with our baby girl. Thank you, Madidsyn, for the love that you brought into our lives. We will always cherish the special little moments that we had with you. You truly are a valiant daughter of our Heavenly Father. And although we wanted you here with us, we know that there is a greater plan and mission for you in Heaven. We love you Maddie Girl." Love eternally, Mom and Dad."
Published in the Deseret News on 1/1/2005.

Be strong!
Lance
 
My deepest condolences on your loss. I can't imagine what you must be feeling right now, but know that my thoughts are with you.
 
Scott, Your loss brought tears to my eyes. The pain will be challenging for years to come, but the love and beauty of your daughter will bring a smile to your face forever. I wish all of the healing in the world to you and your family. We will keep your family in our thoughts and prayers. Jarrod
 
Words cannot express the sympathy I feel for you and your family over the loss of your little angel. God bless you and yours during this extremely painful time.
 
Tuff,

My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. Hopefully you will be blessed with another child in the future.

Ed
 
So sorry to hear of your terrible loss, and at such a joyous time of year. My heart and prayers go out to you and your wife.

Steve
 
Sorry to hear about your loss you and your family will be in our prayers.

Colby and Family
 
Scott,


There is really nothing left for me to say that hasn't already been said. I am so sorry for your loss and my thoughts, and prayers, are with you and yours.

Fred Judson
 
Tuff,

I remeber the first time I posted, I could tell you were truly excited for me. It made me feel good at the time, and I hope you're finding some comfort here. All of our prayers are with you.

Sincerely,

Dallen
 
I feel for you so much, tears are streaming. I have three little girls, and one of them is named Madison. All three of them needed to be resusitated after birth for one reason or another. It was the best and worst experience of my life. I can only say that your family is in our prayers. I am so sorry.
-The Kikendalls
 
Its kind of hard to understand the grand scheme of things such as your loss Scott, Its mind boggling to comprehend what the afterlife would be like right now with all the victims of the tsunami arriving at once, lost my Dad the day before your daughter, I can't begin to fathom why so many souls needed to go within such a short time frame.
 
LAST EDITED ON Jan-03-05 AT 09:15PM (MST)[p]My prayers are with you and your wife as you walk life's toughest trail. God bless and comfort you in your grief.

Jim Rich
 
Tuff,

I am sorry to hear of your loss. Keep your chin up and know that you and your wife will get through this. I will be praying for you and your wife.

Chad
 
I am truly sorry for your loss. You and your family are in our prayers.

Steve
 
LAST EDITED ON Jan-03-05 AT 10:08PM (MST)[p]Tuff-

Sad news like this brings us back to reality and shows us that heavenly father knows when it is our time to rejoin him. My deepest sorrows on your tuff lost, I'm sorry you didn't get to spend more time with your little girl. Losing a child has to be the tuffest thing in the world to over come. Know yur family here at monster muleys will always keep you in our prayers.

Traig Jones


snipersmilie.gif

one shot
 
Tuff - Sorry to hear about your loss. I hope for the best to you and your family. You and your family will be in our prayers.

IB
 
That is a very hard situation to swallow, and as a father of two little ones I cant imagine your sense of loss. Ill keep you and your family in my prayers.
 
Tuff,

There is nothing more that I can say that has not already been said. I pray that your heavenly father will take care of you and the rest of your family while you find away to over come this change.

Friends at MM
400bull
 
My wife was pregnant for the first time and lost the baby 10 days before she was due to be born. I now truly know what it means to be broken hearted. One of our friends managed to come up with some words that we found comforting, I'll paraphrase:

"Your daughter never knew doubt or fear. She never knew dispair or betrayal. All she ever knew was the sound of your voices, laughter, the comfort of your touch, and the endless love that surrounded her."

We mustered the courage and strength to try again, but lost our 2nd child at 5 months. We weren't the only ones grieving that day though. It was September 11th, 2001. The third time was a charm, we now have a beautiful girl who is 19 mths old and the center of the universe. There will be joy in your life again. Be kind and supportive to your wife and lean on your friends and family for support. I started going to church again and my life has never been better.

May God bless you.
 
Scott,

My 2nd son was born on the 28th of October, and I can't stand the thought of losing him (or my other son for that matter) after such a short sojourn in this life. I can only imagine what you're going through, but lean on your loved ones that still surround you. That's what they're there for. Judging from the tender sentiments of your daughter's obituary, it sounds like you know what it's all about (if you know what I mean). Draw strength from that and the special gift given to all who enter into the fold. Hang in there bro.

EG



campfire2.gif
"A man can be hard to find in the mountains, but you're welcome at my fire anytime."
 
tuff,
I can't seem to find the words to say to you. My wife and I will be keeping you and yours in our prayers.

Kevin and Judi Reed
 
Tuff
Sometimes words alone aren't enough at times like this but rest assured you and your wife and family are in our thoughts and prayers.
Rod
 
Tuff--

My wife and I also lost our first child due to a miscarriage. It was, and still is, very difficult for us. The only comfort my wife and I could find was knowing that our little baby, much like yours, was such a strong and faithful spirit of our Heavenly Father that she didn't need to be tested here on earth. You and your wife must also have done something special in the pre-existence to have had the opportunity to bring such a righteous spirit into this world. She is now with her Heavenly Father waiting for her eternal family to join her. Our prayers are with you.
 
Sorry for your loss. I have two daughters and couldn't imagine losing one of them. They are my world. The best thing you can do is stay close to your family for each others support. Take care.
 
my jaw dropped at this post...my oldest daughter's name is Madison.

i am so sorry to hear of your loss. you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
 
If my wife could see me now! And I told her I never cry... Man Tuff I am very sorry to hear about your loss. I remember when my first child was born and how it seemed so strange to just instantly love someone that I didn't really even know. I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling. You and your wife will pull through this. Things will work out and when they do you'll be that much stronger.

Take care,

NvrEnuf
 
Scott-
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and you family. God Bless
David
 
I just wanted to say a big thank you to you all for your kind words, thoughts, and prayers on mine and my wife's account. Your wonderful response to this post serves as an honor to my daughter, and for that I am deeply touched and grateful. You will never know how much your kind words and sentiments have meant to my wife and I. Its good to know that this place has so many "class acts". The words that you have written really have helped, more than you probably realize.

Thank you again. If there is anything I can do to ever repay any of you for your kindness, please don't hesitate to ask. Thank you so much for allowing me to share with you my beloved Maddie Girl.

Your friend and brother,

Scott
 
maddison is a beautiful name god bless you and your family you'll hunt with her some day, when you meet again.
 
I'm sorry TuffBucker. I never even read this post until now. I have a son and can't imagine what your going thru. Stay tough and hang in there.
BB
 
Thought that this would be appropriate with the earlier post. Just a little poem for you and your loss. May your daughter's memory always fill you and your wife life.

The mention of my child's name
May bring tears to my eyes,
But it never fails to bring
Music to my ears.

If you are really my friend,
Let me hear the beautiful music of her name.
It soothes my broken heart
And sings to my soul.
~~~~author unknown

sneakem
 
Scott and Mindy-

I wish I could help you, and words are trivial compared to what you're going through, but anyways please continue to be strong. My prayers are with you and your lovely daughter. I have a 2-year old and can't even imagine life without her right now. I'm sure I couldn't muster enough strength to even write the post and the obituary if I was in your position.

Thank you for putting a little bit of perspective into our everyday lives.

Doug
 
LAST EDITED ON Jan-06-05 AT 04:51PM (MST)[p]Scott,
This quote is on the headstone of my cousins baby daughter who died in similar circumstances as your Maddie. Hopefully, you can find a small measure of solace in it.

"I have held many things in my hands, and I have lost them all; but whatever I have placed in God's hands, that I still possess"

Martin Luther


God Bless
 
I keep coming back to this post.
It's weight superceeds all others.
God,I'm sorry.
Burrying a son or daughter is beyond description.
People care.
I hope you can find the strength to continue.
Do her proud.
HH
 
Scott, I truly am sorry for you and your family. You will be in our prayers.......... Allen Taylor......
 
I am sorry about your lose, tell your wife and family ya'll are in my thoughts and prayers.
 
I'm really sorry. I have a little girl and my worst fear is that. Sometimes I even do really superstitious things to "guarantee" her safety.
 
I stared at my computer screen a long time before I started typing. Few things move me to tears as the loss of a child does. Nothing I can say will take the pain away, but know your family is in the prayers of ours. mtmuley
 
tuffbuck....so sorry, i totally missed this post....my familys' condolences to you and your family....tough row, i'm sure....maintain. lf
 
I really don't know what to say. I can't comprehend your loss. Hang in there. Littlebuck
 
There is not anything to say but that this hard time will pass. Be carefull with those you love for tough times don't always bring out the best in us. God bless.
Andy
 
Tuff,

My heart goes out to you and your family and I can't even begin to know how you feel. I'll definitely say a prayer for your little girl and hope that your loved ones will help ease your pain as time goes on...
 
Tuff,I truly do not have the words to say, but I will pray for you and your family. Reading this post has humbled me. What we are going through with our four month old boy is minimal compared to the loss you have. I wish I could snap my fingers and bring that Angel back Tuff, I am truly sorry.God Bless You and your Family.
 
I am deeply sorry for your loss. Our prayers go out to you and your wife. May God Bless you and yours and help you through this.
 

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