Redneck Medical dictionary

[caelkhnter]

>REDNECK GUIDE TO MEDICAL TERMS"
> >
> > BENIGN------------------------What you be after you be eight
> > ARTERY------------------------The study of paintings
> > BACTERIA----------------------Back door to the cafeteria
> > BARIUM------------------------What doctors do when patients die
> > CESAREAN SECTION------------A neighborhood in Rome
> > CAT-SCAN---------------------Searching for kitty
> > CAUTERIZE---------------------Made eye contact with her
> > COLIC-------------------------A sheep dog
> > COMA-------------------------Punctuation mark
> > D&C---------------------------Where Washington is
> > DILATE------------------------To live long
> > ENEMA------------------------Not a friend
> > FESTER-----------------------Quicker than someone else
> > FIBULA------------------------A small lie
> > G.I. SERIES-------------------World Series of military baseball
> > HANGNAIL--------------------What you hang your coat on
> > IMPOTENT--------------------Distinguished or well-known
> > LABOR PAIN-------------------Getting hurt at work
> > MEDICAL STAFF---------------Doctors' cane
> > MORBID-----------------------A higher offer than I bid
> > NITRATES---------------------Cheaper than day rates
> > NODE-------------------------I knew it
> > OUTPATIENT------------------A person who has fainted
> > PAP SMEAR--------------------A fatherhood test
> > PELVIS------------------------Second cousin to Elvis
> > POST OPERATIVE--------------A letter carrier
> > RECOVERY ROOM--------------Place to do upholstery
> > RECTUM-----------------------Damn near killed him
> > SECRETION--------------------Hiding something
> > SEIZURE-----------------------Roman emperor
> > TABLET-----------------------A small table
> > TERMINAL ILLNESS-------------Getting sick at the airport
> > TUMOR------------------------More than one
> > URINE-------------------------Opposite of you're out
> > VARICOSE---------------------Really not far