Reasons why having a toddler is like a frat party-
10. There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub.
9. There's always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner.
8. It's best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function.
7. You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that as soon as you sit down, someone's going to start banging on the door.
6. Probably 80% of the stains on the furniture contain DNA.
5. You've got someone in your face at 3 a.m. looking for a drink.
4. There's definitely going to be a fight.
3. You're not sure whether anything you're doing is right, you just hope it won't get you arrested.
2. There are crumpled-up underpants everywhere.
1. You wake up wondering exactly how and when the person in bed with you got there.
Other good ones:
You lie to your parents about what's going on at your place.
At least one person is lying on the floor, either face up or face down, singing at the top of their lungs.
All conversation occurs as though at least one of you has forgotten the language.
People can't climb the stairs without using their hands.
Sex is always interrupted.
Some guy is going to spit up and then pass out with his face in your cleavage and a drunken smile on his face.
There is always that one guy who wants to tell you about how great his penis is.
You have to look before walking in front of the stairs because at any point someone could be participating in the indoor stair luge.
Everyone has a Buzz or a Woody ;-)
Everyone in the house uses five or more drinking cups per day because no one can remember where they left theirs.
10. There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub.
9. There's always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner.
8. It's best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function.
7. You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that as soon as you sit down, someone's going to start banging on the door.
6. Probably 80% of the stains on the furniture contain DNA.
5. You've got someone in your face at 3 a.m. looking for a drink.
4. There's definitely going to be a fight.
3. You're not sure whether anything you're doing is right, you just hope it won't get you arrested.
2. There are crumpled-up underpants everywhere.
1. You wake up wondering exactly how and when the person in bed with you got there.
Other good ones:
You lie to your parents about what's going on at your place.
At least one person is lying on the floor, either face up or face down, singing at the top of their lungs.
All conversation occurs as though at least one of you has forgotten the language.
People can't climb the stairs without using their hands.
Sex is always interrupted.
Some guy is going to spit up and then pass out with his face in your cleavage and a drunken smile on his face.
There is always that one guy who wants to tell you about how great his penis is.
You have to look before walking in front of the stairs because at any point someone could be participating in the indoor stair luge.
Everyone has a Buzz or a Woody ;-)
Everyone in the house uses five or more drinking cups per day because no one can remember where they left theirs.
I had forgotten what colleg parties were like. 
