Bear kills Ex-wife!

So the wife and I like to watcher real murder shows together. We joke often about if she were to die suddenly or worse dissappear, I'm screwed. Basically we have learned that all it takes is an unexpected tragedy to a woman and a sister or girlfriend tells the cops she's suspicious of the husband and he's done for.

So a few years ago my kids stayed at their cousins. We took advantage and had date night. Everything went great right up until my perfectly healthy wife fell and smashed her head into the corner of a cherry dresser. It sounded like somebody smacked her with a 2X4 full swing. For a second both her eyes rolled funny. Within a few seconds she started doing a strange crying and laugh at the same time. She was for the most part okay.

We still joke that if she had died I would be sitting in prison today. Just a total freak accident.
 
Blank said:
My wife has been on blood thinners for 20+ years. You should see the bruises she gets sometimes! If she ever goes to the ER for anything, I'm history!!!
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Ditto.

Ellen merely has to slightly bump her arm into anything, and she gets a bruise with all sorts of pretty colors.

I'm not on thinners but also bruise easier now. It's nowhere near as bad as my bride, tho.
 
I came back from an elk hunt with the wife and she ended up with a cut above her eye and a black eye (y’all know what it was from. Yes, she got her elk). I ended up with both eyes swollen almost shut from some weird allergic reaction.
We were quite a mess and our adult kids thought we must have been brawling. Nope, I’m smarter than that!
Yessir, the husband is always the first person to be blamed and it’s only correct 89% of the time.?

Zeke
 

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